The Psychology of Moving to Killeen 06/23/2018by Julie DeLong, A-1 Freeman Moving Group Prepare for the Worst, Hope for the Best Moving is stressful—no matter the circumstances, any time you have to pack up all your worldly belongings (read--old college papers, lamps you've been meaning to repair, kids’ art projects) and move them to a new house is overwhelming for even the most chipper and positive among us. When you have landed your dream job—four states away--and your spouse will have to say goodbye to their career, when life has tossed you a big roadblock and you are more or less given no choice but to move, when living by yourself is no longer safe---you have to handle a bunch of emotional ups and downs at the same time as the anxiety of the actual move to Killeen. A big stressor in moving is understanding the whims of the real estate business. You're a successful adult, respected in your community, and your life is totally at the mercy of some people you have never met--what if your residence does not sell when you want it to? Suppose the buyers buying your house find a different house that they like better? What if they demand you to leave the curtains and the kids' swingset? What if the appraiser sees the crevice in the foundation that's sort of hidden behind the hedge? What if the home inspector discovers your new residence has a bad roof or there is a new bowling alley and travel plaza projected for across the road from your new subdivision? Here is the reality. You have little authority over any of these things. The best plan of attack is to be sure that the realtor helping with your house and the realtor helping you with the new residence are knowledgeable and do their jobs--and work with both to have a emergency plan should something unexpected happen. Real estate transactions are like a huge run of dominoes--closings usually depend on another closing happening as scheduled. One blunder several steps up the food chain can mess up your buyers timeline, and a similar thing goes for the home you're moving to—unforeseen glitch could mean you cannot close on the day that you thought you could, and you're up at night pondering how it's going to feel to be homeless for a few days, or if you might just move into one of the moving company’s trucks and set up camp. Take a deep breath. One of the perks of the recession is that real estate regulations have changed and there are not nearly as many last-minute surprises with your closings. You should discover any possible concerns well in advance of your closing date, and in case that something does fluctuate, moving companies are very used to working with changing schedules. If an issue does slow you down, you should have the choice of moving in a few days before you actually close--again, a good realtor plans for contingencies, so you don't have to stress about them. Touch base with your realtors and lender once a week leading up to your closing date to make sure all the inspections and repairs and other details are going as they should; keeping in the know provides you at least a feeling of control, and if there is a glitch you're not hit unexpectedly. If something dreadful does occur, like if you're building and an out-of-stock supply has postponed inspections and you don't have the occupancy certificate several days prior to closing because the plumbing is not finished, AND you've got an immovable closing date on your old house and the movers are slammed, don't lose it. Most moving companies have temporary or long-term storage until you can get into your new residence, and your realtor can assist you in finding short-term housing until your residence is available. Issues like these are very common, but when they do crop up your stress levels skyrocket--so depend on your team to help you find a remedy. The Emotional Stages of Moving So, you are moving to Killeen--and it could be an exciting time, it could be a challenge. You might be moving three blocks or four hundred miles away. Everybody's scenario is unique, but people are very much alike--the emotional rollercoaster just varies from home to house. Some are kiddie sized, with happy Disney cars to ride in, and others parallel a death-defying, nausea-inducing Loch Ness monster. The accomplishment is to turn that roller coaster into a peaceful ride with chipper little people humming "It's A Small World" as you float through your closets. Some researchers and psychologists have equated moving--in any situation--to the Kubler-Ross five stages of grief model. That is, you encounter denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and then acceptance. When you have constructed a life in one place, it's totally natural to have regrets about selling the house where you were carried (or carried) over the threshold, where you brought your kiddos home, where you observed all those birthdays and graduations. If your move is not an option but an essentiality, it's okay to get mad at the state of affairs that have deposited you at the crossroads where you're leaving your house because you have no other options. Be furious, wail and holler at the walls and ask your family and friends for support. Take some time trying to formulate how to not have to move—maybe your spouse could commute, or rent a crash pad in the new city; if you require assistance keeping up with your house, you might consider getting live in help. Thinking through your choices, as insane as they may be, helps you work through the reality of moving so that it's a tad easier to accept it. Then, you might spend several days or weeks in denial, of sorts. This is when your relatives ask if they can come over and help you go through stuff, and you fib a little and say you're nearly done, when in actuality you have thrown out two dried up ink pens and one pair of those disposable pedicure flip flops and don't have a box to your name. If you are really wrestling with the nitty gritty of purging and packing, allow your friends to assist. Or, ask your moving company to box things up for you—the majority of full-service movers have professional packers who can either get you started or do the full job for you. Finally, you will accept the transition and change. It could not be the moment the moving trucks get there, it may take several months. But the human spirit is a resilient thing and you will come to accept and embrace your new surroundings in Killeen. That is not to say it will be without angst, but being willing to making a new life and trying new activities can ease the nostalgia for your old home and your old life. The members of your family will all have similar feelings, although with varying degrees of ferocity--teenagers’ reactions will most likely a tad more aggressive than that of a child. If you are moving from your family abode for senior living because one spouse is not doing well, then the more active spouse may experience more anger and denial. The important thing is to remember that the emotional swings are normal and it would be weird if you did not get sad or mad or a little upset during the process. Keeping your move in perspective is key to getting to the new house in one piece. Your life is not housed in the brick and mortar of your old house, your life is in the memories you've created there. Keep in mind that you will not lose old friends, and that you will meet new ones. And someday, you'll open the front door and think to yourself, "I'm home." Easing the Transition Most people are intrenched in habits--even young children pick their favorite stuffed animal and there’ll be a small catastrophe if it's in the wash at nap time. So, when you move, you're most of the time giving up all your habits in place and even if you are excited about the new house, the new life you've got to evolve around it is difficult to even the most courageous. When you are moving and concerned about establishing a new life for you and your family in Killeen, here are some ways to assist with the transition. Get your family enthusiastic about the relocation to Killeen. If this deciphers to agreeing that your teenage daughter can paint her room black, put a smile on your face and go buy the paint. It may mean you finally have enough space for a dog—figure out what kind of dog would fit best with your family, and as soon as the last box is unpacked, go to the local shelter and pick one out. While you are at it, adopt two dogs, as everybody needs a pal. Let your boys set up tents and camp out in that big backyard. Yes, it's bribery of a sort, but it is all for the best and the thrill of new activities and besides, puppies are a surefire way to put a smile on everyone’s face. And, if you're the one having a hard time with it, seeing your family happy goes a long way to improving your state of mind. When you're moving, the world-wide web (if you're older that phrase means something to you) makes the trip a lot easier. You possibly scoured real estate websites to find your new home and investigate schools and neighborhoods, so you have a pretty good perception already of your new bubble. Use social media to link up with people--towns of all sizes have mom groups that offer all kinds of things from pediatrician reviews to the best yoga classes--and do not forget that your new neighbors are great resources. Many neighborhoods have websites and online directories that tell you whose kids babysit, dog walk and shovel snow. If you have children, finding new activities is a lot more crucial to them than that orthodontist. Being able to jump right back into volleyball or piano lessons or gymnastics keeps them active and helps them fit into their new surroundings-the last thing you want is to have sulking kiddos around the home whining that they hate you and do not have anyone to hang out with. And here's a fun fact—studies show that moving in the middle of the school year can be easier on new students than moving over the summer break. If you start a new school at the beginning of the year it is easier to get lost in the craziness of the new year , but when you come in in the middle of the school year, it's more possible your kids will find friends faster and get more interested in school. The loss of a feeling of security can be a tough part of a move for the adults. When you are accustomed to swinging into a neighbor's home just because it’s part of your routine, moving to a new area where you don't know anyone is rough. Bear in mind that your new neighbors are most likely interested in getting to know you, because they've possibly said adios to their drive-by buddies and are wanting to meet the new neighbors (aka – you!). Walking your dog is a good way to run into the neighbors--their curiosity about you is high, and this provides you an easy way to meet everybody. Most churches and synagogues have newcomers’ gatherings that welcome you and your family, and help you to figure out how you fit within that community. The majority of schools welcome volunteers, so think about getting involved. And, if you are part of a national club such as Rotary or Junior League your membership transfer immediately brings you into a group. Life changes are tough, but by granting yourself and your family the okay to be a little sad about the past will assist everyone embrace the future. If you are planning a move, contact A-1 Freeman Moving Group to begin on your free in-home estimate. We promise to do our part to make your move to Killeen as smooth as possible.